Based iN the arklatex, Cartoonist TRemillian posts slice of life and criticism of culture using methods gleaned from literature studies and a biblical world view.

How to write (not so) terrible Fan-fiction

Okay. So most writers start out journaling, maybe with some short stories, poems, but a lot of people write fanfiction. Sometimes only fan-fiction. Sometimes terrible fanfiction. Here’s my article on how to write better fanfiction.

Rule 1

Avoid what you love. If you’re a fan of DC, Marvel, One Piece, Dr. Who, Sherlock Holmes. If you’re a fan of anything, write about something else. We don’t want to hear about your self-insert making love to your favorite fictional character. That said, if you’re a Trekkie, write fiction in the Star Wars universe. If you’re a Dark Horse fan, write something in the Top Cow or Image settings.

Rule 2

Erotica. It’s a thing right. If you absolutely have to break rule 1, make an original character, even if they’re about as interesting as a box of corn flakes. Oh, and just so we’re clear? Giz isn’t stored in your balls. It’s stored in your prostate. So you can’t “drain a Himbo’s balls.” You can empty their prostrate. Everything should still work after that, but almost no emission, and probably a very low sperm count at that point.

Rule 3

So, you want to make a cosmically powered character and wreck the setting. Is it a revenge fantasy? No, but it might not be much better than wish fulfillment. Oh, that nerd got the Spear of Longinus, and this is how they took over the world. Although, if the nerd loses the Spear to a rival and then has to stop them from taking over the world., then maybe you’ve got a kernel of a story there.

Rule 4

Don’t write something you wouldn’t want someone to read. This isn’t so much a fan-fiction rule as a rule in writing. If you do write things you’d rather not share, then dispose of the work in a way that it can’t come back. I.E. not on an electronic device, but rather on paper which you then shred or burn. Better yet is to just not write things that could be discovered by someone else.

Rule 5

Try taking a character or thing you love (but not too much), and making a knock off. That is, an ersatz (replacement). Some of people’s best characters are tweaked from another character. I’m trying to think of an example. Ahh, 50 shades of Grey. So, it started out as Twilight fanfiction. I don’t recommend Twlight or 50 Shades of Grey in the least, but you might be able to leave fanfiction one day and write something you can have published, maybe something with your own sweat, blood, and ink put into it.

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